We are still commencing "Operation Trolling For Charlie."  Trolling for Charlie is where we basically destroy anyone who has something bad to say about Charlie Sheen.  Someone makes a sh... more

Charlie Sheen is taking a beating right now, and that upsets me.  Why?  Because while most of the world looks down on someone who goes to Vegas for a full 48 hours of doing coke and having sex with hookers, I look up to them.  Yes, Charlie Sheen is my Role Model, a... more

You know it's time to give up hope on someone when you bust them masturbating on your farm, covered in animal shit and mud...twice. A man convicted of sexually gratifying himself in... more

This is the part where I try to be funny by making puns about wet cats and female anatomy.  But then you tell me I'm retarded and shouldn't make another joke again because I suck at life.  And then I counter by wallowing in sorrow, wondering if we can ever be friends ... more

It's that time again.  Right before Spring Break when you're really trying to shake the rest of those holiday pounds off of your fatass by sticking to healthy New Years resolution, you get hit with the worst temptation ever.  Small, over priced cookies, that have been... more

It's no surprise how we feel about half naked hot chicks in these here parts of the interwebs.  Motorcycles are also pretty kick ass.  So when you mix them together, you get blasted in the eyeballs with a truc... more

A 45 year old Pedo named Robert Turnbull has turned himself in to authorities because he felt that he was being blackmailed by the Russian mafia. Robert went to police asking for safety and then let them in on a little secret. Actually, his secret wasn't so little. I... more

At 74 years of age, it isn't easy getting out of the house. Finding a date is extremely hard, and getting laid is probably right next to impossible. Chicago's Raymond Kvacik decided that if he could ... more

A very wasted Ice Cream truck driver was arrested on Monday, shortly after he staggered out of his van.  The 49 year old Ronald Clifford Purdy from Florida was caught by police w... more

A few weeks ago Ryan and RM's own Jason wanted to know if a waitress is flirting with you, how do you know if she's actually in to you? Is she just doing it for the tip, or does she want you to get her digits? If you'd like to ask Hayley a question about dating, r... more