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Robbie Knievel’s Latest Stunt is a Super Hardcore DUI

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If Evel Knievel is the Hank Williams of motorcycle stunts, Robbie Knievel is definitely the Hank Williams Jr.  Much in the same way that Williams Jr. took his dad’s legacy of country crooning and turned it into a sparkly shill for aluminum bottled Bud Light packaged in faux patriotism, Robby Knievel drank all of the Bud Light and caused a four car pile up in Montana, completely ignoring his dad’s legacy of badassness.

“Are you ready for some legacy tarnishing garbage music?!?”

Evel Knievel’s most famous stunt was when he failed to jump 13 school buses on his motorcycle. The attempt was incredibly hardcore, and even after crashing and obtaining severe injuries, he refused a stretcher and walked out of the arena on his own two feet. Robbie’s most recent stunt was similar in that he did indeed crash and did indeed leave the scene … but it was less of a “display of machismo” and more of an “oh shit, I’m about to get another DUI”.

“Someone put pee in my gas tank. I think it was me.”

It’s clear that Robbie has problems, and we probably shouldn’t be laughing at them, except for the fact that he seems to be the one that finds his behavior funniest. Also, when I was a wee lad, I tuned in to watch Robbie jump the Grand Canyon. After an hour of TV filler, he decided not to do the jump because it was too windy that day, and thusly too dangerous. This man wasted an hour of my life in the name of his own personal safety, but now laughs at the safety of others. Boo this man! Louder!
The author urges all stunt workers to be as hardcore as possible, but make sure you only endanger yourselves. And if you absolutely must do something stupid while drunk, why not follow him on Twitter?

 

REGRETFULMORNING Writer
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