magnifier menu chevron-left chevron-right chevron-down

Scarecrow Sex Kills Man

||

6a00d8341c9f2753ef0120a5a1bfd7970b-800wi

Neighbors of a shepherd in Argentina were shocked to discover what appeared to be two dead bodies on the property. They soon realized that there was in fact only one dead body, which normally would be good news, until you realize that the other body was a freshly fucked scarecrow.

Actually, I don’t want my words to mislead you into thinking that the scarecrow was on the receiving end of things, because a strap-on penis was found next to the scarecrow.

The news report does not specify exactly what the scarecrow looked like, but I doubt things would get any weirder if we found out it was fashioned after, say, the Batman character of the same name.

Admittedly quite the nice dresser.

Admittedly quite the nice dresser.

The report goes on to mention that the 58-year-old man, Jose Alberto, “lived alone” and had “few visitors,” which isn’t actually surprising at all since we know he liked to get pegged (but absolutely did not want any crows to witness the act).

Anyway, Happy Easter.

Matt Pass is a comedian in NJ. Follow him on Twitter @mattpasscomedy.

Also check out #100tupacs: a photoshop of Tupac every day for 100 days!

18 happy easter

  • SPONSORED VIDEO
  • REGRETFULMORNING Writer
    • More From Us