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Are We Ready To Be Visited By Aliens?


I’ve been reading and watching a little too much SciFi lately because it has me thinking that we always get the plot wrong.  They either invade or kill us, or we inadvertently or purposely fuck them up.  In the situations where they invade us, we always end up somehow rising up to thwart a race of war mongering, intergalactic traveling assholes.

Sorry, this wouldn’t happen, no matter how much extra CPU and memory you put in Jeff Goldblum’s computer.  You see, back when ID4 was filmed Jeff would have only had about 100 mhz worth of CPU and 10 mb of memory.  That’s about 1/10th the power of your average iPhone.  That’s only been 15 years and we think it’s ridiculous.  How big of a separation will their be in 150 years?  Or 1500 years?  So picture us flying around in space 1500 years from now and we see a planet that we want to take over.  They hit us with everything they have and then try to crack our firewall with a 100 mhz laptop.  We’d lulz in their faces.

A few days ago Hurricane Sandy reached out like a pimp and smacked the east coast like a hoe.  Houses were destroyed, power was lost, and humanity was tested.  While a lot of people came together to help each other out, there were still some pretty brutal fist fights over gasoline.  A few years before that we had Katrina.  People got raped, beaten, and even killed, and not from the weather.  Hell, people even shot bullets at the relief helicopters.  THEY WERE COMING TO HELP THEM but these ignorant douches shot at them anyway.

So let’s say we are lucky enough to have a race full of 3 titted beautiful aliens come visit us in the future.  We’d get fucked up pretty fast.  The lowest common denominator will end up trying to blow them up, while the rest of us just want our dick’s sucked (and maybe a courtesy probing).   The 3 titted babes will level our shit and continue to the next planet full of primates they can mate with.

Are we ready for aliens?  Nope.

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