Name: Luke
Age (at the time): 21

One night a friend asked me if I wanted to head into NYC for a night of drinking with some girls he knew from Oneonta college. He said one of them had an apartment in the city and bartends at a bar nearby. We would be staying at her place that night.

When we got to her apartment we met the three girls, two lived in the apartment and one was there visiting. we’ll call the girls Lauren Terry and Messica. We get to the bar where Terry works as a shot girl it’s a pretty cool place there’s 3 huge tables for beer pong, hot shot girls in skimpy clothes everywhere and pitchers are cheap as fuck.

Long story short me and Messica lose a game of beerpong to these grizzly adams type bulldykes and she ends up insulting their friend in a wheel chair (fucked up yes but I have no idea what she even said to the girl) the dykes are going nuts threatening to beat her ass and Messica can barely stand. Terry’s working and Lauren is busy with my friend in the corner of the bar so Terry asks me to walk her home, its just a block away so I said fine.

Get the girl home and finally into her room after having to convince her I wasn’t going to rape her lol (had no intention of sleeping with her she was gross and Terry was still at the bar and way better looking) she passes out and I head back to the bar.

4 am comes around and we’re all on the verge of dying and the bar just closed we get home and me Lauren and my friend pass out down stairs on a pull out bed just outside Messica’s room.  About a half hour later the door flies open and she comes running out and falls onto the bed with us.

She mumbles some shit I have no idea what and runs into the bathroom.  Her bedroom is the only one with AC and its hot as fuck so I get up to go lay in her bed.  As soon as I got into the room it smells funky and I stepped in what felt like a warm puddle.  At this point I’m scared thinking this girl just puked on her floor and ran to the bathroom so I’m kinda grossed out yell to my friend and Lauren that Messica puked all over the room.  They kinda sat up and my friend noticed the smell.  I grabbed a roll of paper towels that were on her dresser and wiped my foot.

I immediately noticed it wasn’t throw up. This girl had shit all over her floor, on the pull out couch where she fell on us, and tracked shit foot prints into the bathroom where she was now passed out. I screamed and started gagging while the 3 of us ran upstairs to wake her roommate. I scrubbed my foot in the bathroom threw my clothes on and me and my friend headed to the train station at 5am still wasted.

The next day Messica explained to her friend that she got a lil sick and threw up alot down stairs but it was too late we already knew what happened and the name Messica stuck.

Dear Luke, I have some good news and bad news.  The good news is, Messica probably doesn’t think you (or any other man on this planet) want to rape her anymore.  The bad news is…well… you stepped in her shit bro.