Another reason we hate winter [PICS]


It makes practical jokes, like the one shown below, much more difficult to achieve . Here, we have a Toyota Corolla, covered with ice and road salt, parked outside of a diner that results in more vomit and rear trauma than a Jonas Brothers concert in prison. Two amigos decide to dress it up while I’m AFK, as the General Lee, from the Dukes of Hazard. Realizing too late that it was a Japanese car, it became the General Tso, like the chicken. Mmmm, chicken.

Because you can’t have a redneck ride without a racing number.

“Man. You really like Tide.” -Mitch Hedberg (RIP)
“Man. You really like balls.” -anyone who sees this car drive by

The all-important stars and bars; the sign of a sophisticated redneck.

So no one misses the screaming irony as the driver passes them on the street. “General Tso”

Fuck it. You can’t make me not love my car. So I went with it. That’s my right rear hubcap, attached a la Flava Flav, to my neck by a wallet chain.

To see more of my exploits, or to follow my writing for Regretful Morning and various less awesome sites, follow me on Facebook or Twitter!

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