Age (at the time): 16
As the end of the week was nearing, my buddies and I decided to head to a baseball game on the Friday night and pre-drink what we at the time thought was a bit of alcohol.
All of us being beer guys where unaware of two crucial things. Number one, how much liquor is too much? And how much could we handle? Between the 6 of us we bought 3 26′s (750ml bottles of vodka) and a bottle of lemonade each.
After setting up our bottles they were almost all vodka and no juice. We decided then to down these babies on the subway ride over. Every time the doors would chime that they were shutting we would chug. Seven stops later and my bottle is empty. This was roughly a 20 minute trip so far.
At first i was extremely proud of not only my speed, but the fact that i did not feel the least bit sick or even drunk for that matter. Fastforward 5 minutes and my world was upside down. About 15 minutes later we arrive at Mcdonald’s and this is where my memory is blurry. (all of this from here on out is what i have been told) Having not yet bought tickets, I proceeded to approach every scalper in site, attempt to talk them down lower, and then proceed to tell them to fuck off when i was unsuccessful.
Some lucky scalper also received a fresh chunk of big mac to the hand while I negotiated. Thia happened about 5 more times until we finally got to the Rogers Centre. Upon getting there, i immediately felt like shit and sat down demanding my bud.
Upon getting into the Rogers Centre we could hear that the game had started so we proceeded to sprint up the ramp as fast as we could. This worked out pretty well for me until i felt like a train hit me in the stomach. I leaned over the railing and threw up onto the lower parts of the ramp. Some older chick that worked there came up to check on me to which Alex covered for me saying i had eaten bad McDonald’s and must have had food poisoning.
I then remember being in my seat and watching whoever was even pitching that night throw two pitches. The next thing i remember is getting tapped and being told we had to leave. Apparently my other friend “Ted” who was their swallowed his chewing tobacco and was throwing up between his legs in the seat. I was passed out on the railing. Another friend was throwing up in the washroom.
The cops took down my information and “Ted’s” who they had being inspected by the paramedics. They then told us to leave immediately and that they would phone home to check on us, but would not inform our parents if we left like they said we would.
Upon leaving some nasty drunk bitches start screaming and bragging about how they got kicked out and begin talking to us. Even in my horribly drunken state, i could tell these girls were disgusting and chose to sit down while my buddies got their game on. One of them offered to show me her tits if i got up and started walking so i jumped to my feet hoping to see some tit but i was sadly disappointed.
Allegedly, I was carried home by my friend “Terry” all the way from the station to the bus they put me on which (took me home an hour later). Since that day, I have not been able to smell hard liquor and am constantly reminded about the night we got tossed out for being a total shit show in our seats after watching two pitches of the game.
Dear Skeeter, when people go out to sporting events, in the back of their mind they’re kind of thinking “Man I hope we don’t run in to _________. You and your friends fill in that blank perfectly. I’m not saying what you did was wrong, but the chugging Vodka game may have been overkill. Try it again at about half speed and let us know how it turns out.