Becca’s Hunchback
July 7, 2008 · Print This Article
Name: Becca
Age: 25
In my youth, I was all about the club scene. I regularly got into 21+ bars because of my…physique…and spent a ton of money on gin and tonics and ecstasy. One night, loaded on 2 tabs of X, I began dancing with this guy who I thought looked like a supermodel. Back then, I rarely gave any guy the time of day because I was such a conceited asshole, but in my ecstasy fueled mind I thought I had found my one true partner. Based on his looks.
I know, I was such a bitch.
We spent the rest of the time together, and my girlfriends kept telling me how sweet I was to pick this guy up. I thought they were saying that because I never was the one to pursue men, and I kept agreeing and feeling pretty good about myself.
2am rolled around and I decided I was going to take this guy home. We arrived at my house, I turned the light on in the living room and got my first good look at this guy.
I brought home a 40 year old hunch back.
Look, I am not discriminating in any way against people with disabilities, or physical “quirks”. But a 19 year old girl who had her head up her own ass, bringing home a man with a hunch back? I still get a chuckle out of it. I remember going to the kitchen and immediately doing 2 shots of vodka and after that, going to lay down on the couch. I passed out, woke up the next morning and he was gone.
When I asked my friends why on earth they didn’t tell me, they said it was too funny to let slide. Those bitches. Even though this happened 6 years ago, I still get razzed when we go out to bars. What are friends for?
Dear Becca, I would have given you 1 million cool points if you had given him a sympathy tug. Poor guy had double hunch when he left your place. One on his back, and one in his shorts (not to mention blue balls).
Shallow Bitch!
That was funny and sad! Hunch back gets no action:(
Once, I brought home a girl who had club foot.. Only, I didn’t notice it until I was peeling off her panties.. I freaked out ’cause for a second there in my drunken confusion I thought she was a real live monster! She freaked out in turn and stormed out half naked. Sad thing is, I wouldn’t have cared… she was SUPER hot and cool.
If you’re out there girl, I’m sorry. :(
haha - thats love
Whatcha gonna do with all that junk?
Gonna gitcha love drunk off my hump.
my hump
my hump
gonna gitcha off with my Quasi-hump!
lol Matt! Strangelove I totally would hit a club foot to man as long as shes hot.
See? It’s things like this that have made me completely block out any memories of my life from 18-24. Too painful and embarrassing to think about!
LMFAO @ Matt!
I know, what can I say? If the X hadn’t worn off by 2am, I might have given him a little “sympathy”, perhaps….but probably not, lol. Also, great pic to go along with this post. ;)
Ok best comment goes to Matt, funny shit man!! Becca I hope you have some better friends now girl…it’s ok to let that go on at the club, laugh and make jokes (take video and pictures if your Jason) but to let you take him home now that is just wrong!
I need to Roll some X and head to the bar. 10 bucks says I won’t chicken out if I run into a hunchback and/or club foot.
You got my back on this right Matty?
With 2 Tabs of X it would make a turd in a hat look good.
That’s an awesome story.
Karma truly is a bitch.
Of course it would be a lot funnier on ’shrooms!!
All the good hunchback puns are taken. Funny story.
Be creative and follow my lead Tim! “Hey Becca, Notredam called - they want their hunchback back”
She should have at least let him dry hump her.